Shattered Mirror Read online

  “That doesn’t mean he paid more attention to me. You sat there and smiled and listened, and I could see that he was aware of every motion you made.” She wrinkled her nose. “If I didn’t like you, it might have upset me. I’m too vain not to resent not being the center of attention.”

  “Imagination. You were the center of attention. Jock even mentioned how beautiful you were.”

  “Yeah, and he’s been charming and fascinating and made me pretty dizzy. All that sex appeal in that gorgeous facade is almost irresistible. I hope you know how self-sacrificing I’m being not to find a way to take him to bed.”

  Cara felt a ripple of shock. “Are you?” Then she recovered. “Why should you be? That’s up to you and Jock, isn’t it?”

  She chuckled. “But that rocked you a little. I can see it. I’ve never made a secret that I enjoy sex as long as it doesn’t interfere with my studies. You’ve always been cool with it.”

  “Don’t be crazy. You’re twenty years old. Your choice. Why shouldn’t I be cool with it? It’s none of my business.”

  “But Jock is your business, so it made you blink. That’s why I said it. I wanted to see if I could ruffle you a bit.” She smiled mischievously. “And crawl under that wall that you’ve built to keep me from finding out what I want to know. I’m not like you. I have a tendency to barge in where angels fear to tread. While you’re thoughtful and sensitive, and you care about feelings and all that business about allowing people ‘their space.’”

  “I’ve always thought those were good rules to follow.” Cara added, “And I haven’t noticed that you’re all that insensitive. You’re just … curious.”

  “No.” Darcy’s smile vanished. “Not all the time. I pick and choose.” She was silent; and then, when she did speak, it was with an awkwardness that Cara had never heard from her. “I don’t have many friends, Cara. Those I do have, I have trouble keeping. Oh, I have plenty of acquaintances and people who call themselves my friends. It’s not the same.”

  Cara frowned. “Why not? Surely one thing leads to another. Everyone here at school thinks you’re wonderful.”

  “Oh, I am wonderful,” she said mockingly. “It doesn’t even matter that I’m a has-been actress at twenty. I’m a double threat. I have a terrific voice, and I’m probably in the top five percent as far as looks are concerned.”

  “Two percent.”

  “Whatever. It depends on what you’re looking for. It draws people to me, but it’s no guarantee they’ll stay. I was megafamous, and some people just like to warm their hands at the embers. Oh, I’ll be famous again, and everyone knows it. So life with me turns out to be a kind of competition. It’s always been that way. My mother, everyone with whom I came in contact over the years, even the guys I have sex with…” Her lips twisted. “It’s been a long time since I was with anyone who I was really close to. Anyway, when the academy moved me in with you, I thought it was going to be the same problem. Everyone knows that you’re going to be a superstar, so I was bracing myself. But it wasn’t a problem and I … liked you. I felt safe with you.”

  “Safe?” Cara laughed. “Well, I’m definitely no threat to you.”

  “You are, but it’s not important to you.” She shrugged. “But I decided I don’t want to lose you, so I had to know what to do to keep that from happening. That’s why I kept asking you all those questions. Of course you’d only go so far, then you shut me out. You’re friendly and warm, but you’re very private. And that’s okay. Everyone has secrets. I just want to know enough so that I don’t step on your toes.” She made a face. “You’re looking at me as if I’m certifiable. I could have kept all this to myself, but I have this honesty thing. And you’re smart, so you’d see through me eventually.”

  “I’m not sure about that,” she said dryly. “Because you have me completely confused. In my world, that’s not how friendships are developed.”

  “In my world, it is,” Darcy said quietly. “I like your world much better. That’s why I’m trying to be honest with you. I just want to understand you and how you react, so that you won’t end up walking away from me. I thought I was close to it once you told me about your Eve and the rest of your family.” She shook her head. “But I’m having trouble placing Jock Gavin in the scheme of things.”

  Cara was staring at her in disbelief. This conversation was becoming increasingly bizarre with every moment. “So you think that going to bed with him will help you do that?”

  “No, but putting the suggestion out there might have.” She drew a deep breath. “No way. I made a mistake. I realize that would definitely be a wrong step. Forget I said anything.”

  “That’s hard to do.”

  “I was just experimenting, and I sometimes leap before I think. I’m backing off from Jock.”

  Cara moistened her lips. “I told you that’s not necessary.”

  “I disagree. Though I doubt if it would have gone anywhere anyway.”

  “Of course it might.” She tried to smile. “You’re the two percent. Why do you think I’d mind? He’s my best friend. I’ve known Jock for years, and do you know how many dozens of women he’s had in that time?”

  “No.” Darcy paused. “Did you count?”

  Cara’s hand clenched on the sheet. “It had nothing to do with me.”

  “Not then, but maybe now? I’m not taking the chance.” She made a face. “I’ve sort of bungled this. What do you expect? I’m a blonde, for heaven’s sake. And I told you I wasn’t all that clever. I’m sorry.”

  “Stop that, we both know that’s just part of your act. You’re only as dumb or smart as you choose to be. You just don’t understand this.”

  “Right, I don’t understand anything about you and Jock. That’s why I’m bowing out. But I thought I did understand about sex since I seduced my voice teacher when I was only sixteen. I just thought I was seeing the signs. Maybe I was wrong.” She reached over and turned off the lamp, plunging the room into darkness. “Good night, Cara.”

  It took a moment before Cara managed to reply. “Good night.”

  “And you’ll forgive me if I was out of line? It’s not often I feel as if I can trust someone. It went to my head. I promise I’ll watch myself from now on.” Her voice was completely devoid of its usual lightness. “Sometimes I have a habit of getting carried away in the moment and saying the wrong thing. It’s a mistake that’s cost me dearly.”

  There was no doubting Darcy’s complete sincerity. “You just … surprised me. You’ve never showed me this side of you. I told Jock you were the complete package. I had no idea you were—”

  “Oh, I am the complete package.” Her tone was flip again. “Just throw in a dash of vulnerability and a tiny scoop of annoying persistence along with it.” She paused. “So we’re okay?”

  “We’re okay.” Cara was still bewildered. “But we might need to talk again.”

  “We can do that.” She turned over on her side. “I’ll just be more careful next time…”

  * * *

  Darkness.

  Only the lights of the street below filtered in from behind the drapes to fall on the two beds in the bedroom. Darcy had fallen asleep a couple hours ago, Cara knew. But she was still lying here staring into the darkness, wide-awake.

  “You don’t talk about him to me,” Darcy had said.

  And that had been the beginning, Cara thought.

  But it was how it had ended that had left her stunned and confused.

  Not then, but now?

  I thought I did understand about sex.

  I just thought I was seeing the signs …

  The signs that Cara wanted to have sex with Jock who had been the center of her existence for all these years? To be one of those women who went to his bed and had him inside her in that most intimate way possible?

  Her body was heating, tingling, at the thought, she realized, robbing her of breath as the tension started as she imagined his hands—

  Wrong. All wrong. He was her best friend. T
hat was her place in his life. She had value to him in that role. She was not one of the women who passed in and out of his existence, then faded away.

  The mere idea of that happening filled her with panic. She wouldn’t be able to bear that isolation from him. They were so close, so … complete … together. She couldn’t let this crazy physical response destroy it. That’s not what he wanted from her. She wasn’t one of the dazzling 2 percent like Darcy. Hell, she was only eighteen and still a damn virgin. No competition. She had no desire to be competition. She wanted him to be her friend.

  Not then, but now?

  Dear God, she was lying to herself. Yes, she wanted what they had together now. But her body wanted something entirely different.

  And how long had she been lying to herself? There was no telling. Probably as her body had matured and changed through the years, so had the need for sexual intimacy with him. But she had known what a terrible threat that could be for their relationship, so she had buried it, smothered it, never let it come to the surface.

  Which is what she had to do again, she thought desperately. She had to keep what she had with Jock or he would eventually leave her, and she would be alone again.

  She could do this. Evidently, she had buried that sexual response even from herself. It was only Darcy’s probing that had brought it to the surface. When she next saw Jock, she would see that she was back to normal. Maybe, in time, it would go away entirely.

  But it was not going to be easy. It would be better if she didn’t lie here thinking about Jock or any of this sex business. She would get a glass of water and go over and sit on the window seat and watch the traffic on the street below. She always found the sound of traffic strangely soothing.

  She needed soothing.

  She tossed her blanket aside and headed for the bathroom.

  She was acutely aware of the softness of the carpet under her bare feet as she crossed the room and the feel of her nightshirt rubbing against her bare breasts as she breathed in and out.

  Heat. Throbbing. A clenching that she had never—

  Stop it. Ignore it.

  It was only that she had just discovered what was happening to her that made it so difficult to dismiss …

  * * *

  Darcy screamed!

  Cara jerked upright on the window seat, her gaze flying to Darcy’s bed across the room.

  She was tossing and turning, eyes closed, tears running down her cheeks.

  Nightmare.

  Cara had told Eve that it would be an intrusion to let Darcy know that she was aware of those terrible dreams that seemed to come so often.

  But Darcy had never screamed like that before. And it could be that Darcy had been as disturbed as Cara before she had gone to sleep, and that had sent her spiraling down. Who knows what caused the phantoms of the mind to attack?

  To hell with not intruding.

  No one knew better than Cara how painful it was to face those phantoms alone. She was on her feet and across the room in a heartbeat. “Wake up, Darcy.” She was on the bed, gathering her close and rocking her back and forth. “It’s all over. It’s gone. It’s fine. Wake up now.”

  Darcy was pushing her away. “It’s not fine.” The tears were still pouring down her cheeks. “It will never be fine again.” She was sobbing. “Not here. Empty. Always be empty…”

  Cara took her shoulders and shook her. “Open your eyes, Darcy. Do you hear me? Wake up!”

  Darcy slowly opened her eyes. “I hear you.” Her voice was slurred. Then she shook her head to clear it. “How could I help it? You’re almost shouting. What’s wrong with you anyway?”

  “Not a thing,” she said, relieved. She sat up and swung her legs to the floor. “But there was something that was wrong with you. You just had a bad dream. But it’s over now.” She got to her feet. “I’ll get you a glass of water. Why don’t you grab a tissue and wipe your face? I’ll be right back.”

  She went to the bathroom and stood there, letting the water run for a few minutes. It wouldn’t hurt to give Darcy a little time to regain her composure before she had to face someone who had seen how vulnerable she could be. Then she filled the glass and took the water out to her.

  Darcy had turned on the lamp and was sitting up in bed. Her eyes were still red, but she was no longer crying. “You didn’t have to do this, you know.” She took the glass and took a sip. “It’s not as if I need anyone to—”

  “I know you don’t,” Cara interrupted. “It’s probably embarrassing you, and that’s too bad. But I know about nightmares, and I couldn’t let it go on. I’ve had too many of my own.” She smiled. “It hurt me to see you hurting. So just consider that I did it for myself.”

  Darcy nodded slowly. “I’ll try not to bother you again.” She tried to smile. “Evidently, I cause you trouble whether I’m awake or asleep. I wouldn’t blame you if you put in a request for a new roommate.”

  “Why? Most of the time we get along fine. We can get through this.” She looked her in the eye. “You told me that everyone has secrets. What’s more secret or personal than a nightmare? You just have to promise to be there for me when I have mine.” She paused. “And let me choose what other secrets … or information I want to share with you.”

  She was silent. “Oh, I’ll be there for you when you have to fight off the nightmares, Cara.” Then she smiled. “Now that last is going to be difficult, but I’ll work on it. You may have to slap me down occasionally.”

  “I can do that.” Cara took the empty glass and set it on the nightstand. “Now can we try to get to sleep?” She got into bed and pulled up the covers. “It seems like a long time since we came back from dinner…”

  A time that had been filled with changes and uncertainties. Nightmares and revelations that had given her a new view on Darcy Nichols.

  And one stunning self-revelation that might become a terrifying nightmare of her own.

  * * *

  The light in the cottage was burning bright.

  Eve Duncan was working late on the skull as she had every night since he’d given her the gift, Norwalk knew. Was she coming close?

  According to his research on her, she must be very close. Even when she was working at a steady pace, it seldom took her more than five or six days to complete a reconstruction. When she was driven, sometimes only three or four.

  Norwalk smiled. And you’re driven, aren’t you, Eve? I did that to you.

  It was exhilarating having that much power over a woman who possessed so much power herself. He would have more power soon, but for now this was enough. It was according to plan, and the plan was everything.

  But the front door was opening, and Joe Quinn was coming out as he had every night since Norwalk had given the skull to Eve Duncan.

  Too bad. He was very far away from the cottage and was having to watch it through binoculars, but he knew he would still have to leave now that Quinn was on the move. Quinn was painstakingly thorough as he’d noticed the night he’d dropped off the box with the skull. And he was an ex-SEAL and not someone Norwalk wanted to deal with right now. Quinn would search the entire area thoroughly before he’d go back to Duncan and his son.

  … And that blackened monstrosity of a skull that was now ruling that house because Norwalk had willed it so.

  * * *

  “You’re going to work on Sylvie tonight?” Michael asked drowsily as Eve tucked him into bed. “I’m glad … she’s been waiting for a long time.”

  “By the time I get them, they’ve all been waiting for a while.” Eve pulled his blanket higher around his throat. There was nothing more wonderful than a glowing, beautiful child who was just on the edge of slumber. “Do you know once I did a reconstruction on a woman who was over two thousand years old?”

  “You never told me that. Neat.”

  “It doesn’t matter how long they’ve been waiting. It’s still my job to bring them home.”

  He nodded, his eyes closing. “But Sylvie is kind of special, isn’t she?”


  “Maybe. But it could be because she’s the one I’m working on tonight.”

  He shook his head. “You don’t like what he did to her…”

  “No,” she said softly. “Neither do you. I remember, you did tell me to fix her.”

  “She’s already fixed inside … You need to match it…”

  He was asleep.

  Beautifully asleep.

  She leaned closer and touched that warm, silky cheek with her index finger.

  Strange, she felt as if that mystical strength that belonged to all children and Michael, in particular, was pouring into her from that featherlight contact.

  Whimsical nonsense. But she had learned a lot about whimsy since Michael had come into her life. Accept it. Enjoy it.

  She got to her feet, leaned forward, and brushed a kiss on her son’s forehead. “Sleep well,” she whispered. “Tomorrow.”

  She turned out his lamp and glided toward the door.

  A few minutes later, she was standing before her worktable, gazing down at the reconstruction. It was at the last stage before the actual final sculpting, and every feature was crude, sometimes appearing unfinished. It wasn’t unfinished, every measurement was correct, only waiting for the clay to take on life.

  Eve sat down on her stool. “Here we go, Sylvie. Michael says he thinks that you’re fixed inside, and I pray that’s true. But now we have to do our part. Are you ready?” Her hands moved to the forehead that was now no longer blackened but smooth and flesh-toned. “I am. Let’s make you as beautiful as Michael thinks you are.”

  She held her breath and her fingers started to move on the clay.

  That’s right. Don’t start out too fast.

  Sensitivity.

  Delicacy.

  The clay was cool. It would get warmer as she worked with it.

  It was getting warmer now as her fingers moved faster.

  Time to stop thinking.

  Help me, Sylvie.

  Faster. Her fingers smoothed, molded.

  See, I told you it would come, Sylvie.

  Her fingers were moving of their own volition now.

  Ears. Generic. She had no idea whether they had long lobes or had stuck out.